So close, but so far away

I have two weeks, 5 days until my due date; and i'm dying!

Not really, but if a person could feel joyfully miserable, that would be me right now! Pregnancy is a whole different kind of misery...I wanted this pregnancy more than anything, but experiencing it has put a whole new spin on sacrifice for me!

This is really hard!

Props to all those women who 'love' pregnancy!! cuz I hate it!

No, no, I don't hate it, I'm just really struggling with it.

I absolutely love the fact that this our little gift from Heavenly Father, and I love feeling him move and kick inside me...It has been so amazing, and I feel so incredibly blessed!

BUT -- I am struggling with having this little person suck the life force from me...

I now understand why being a mother is such a sacrifice...because it is!

I've given up my love of rock climbing, running, biking, and pretty much anything that involves self exertion on my part :) This has been a real struggle for me...all of those things are stress relief for me, and not being able to do them has really been taxing...I can't wait to run again!

Also, my focus has shifted from loving to read and write and dream, to thinking only about eating and resting and this little 'parasite' draining my energy! (for lack of a better word)

My hope is, and I hear it from every other mother-but I need to know for myself, that this sacrifice is worth it...cuz right now, I'm not so sure.

I'm scared and worried about motherhood. These last few months have been the struggle of my life to stay sane, not only for myself, but for Jess too. I feel so removed from life...

I guess I'm just looking for something to bitch about because I really have had a great pregnancy!

• No morning sickness
• a little nausea for a few weeks
• I've been able to stay relativity active
• and I'm still able to work

God truly has blessed me...I just can't wait till this time in my life is over...there is a light at the end of the tunnel! One week and five days away...!